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Old 01-23-2007, 09:51 AM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Do's and Do not's of I DO!!!!!

a Few months before I got engaged I wrote you all about My boyfriend who had approached me with his ideals for a wedding as his best friend had just got married..... His best friend is also his cousin and its nothing in their family to laydown 85,000 grand on a wedding which to me is ridiculous....Some of you said run to vegas save the money! Other said spoil yourself...Vegas is out but I did get the amount he wanted to spend down....Best of both I guess......
My fiance makes great money but I can't justify in my heart spending that kind of money....
I have talked him into a budget of $40,000 I want to try to spend even less.....we have 450 on the invite list and I thus far I cut down from 50 of mine and trying to get him to cut alittle....(500 is to much...!!)
SO my question is for all of you who have already been brides or grooms or those planning a wedding...What are some things you wish you hadn't done or spent your money on? What is something that was really nice that you wouldn't have left out? Ideas on ways to save money besides eloping......we have to have a bar.... my family is scotch irish is a tradition LOL Please any suggestions ideas dos or don't would be great.....
Also what did you spend on Flowers, Photography, Gifts for bridal party.....Just so I can get an idea.....I think we are looking at late 2008 for a date so I have given myself plenty of time.....I am so laid back he is going to be groomzilla as he tells me I deserve the best day ever.....
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Old 01-23-2007, 06:42 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Do's and Do not's of I DO!!!!!

Jenn, i am one of those very few that is so simple and everything was paid for by the day of the wedding... everything was so simple that it turned out to be beyond romantic and everyone focused on us and not extravagance! we did silk flowers, because we could not in good conscience have all those flowers cut for us, for such a short time. but that is our deal... i don't have anything against people using real flowers. gifts were just real personel. we did everything "for us", not for anyone else, so our spirit was in everything.

my father in law offered to send us to vegas if we would just stop planning the wedding. we hate him for that to this day. he couldn't stand that our families were helping us and paying attention to us. going the vegas is cool if it is YOU and something you would do... but it is not me and nothing i would do. he completely underestimated us and our commitment to eachother.

we are talking about renewing our vows now and honestly the only thing we want to do differently is have it just be the two of us and our kids... and we want it outside in the forest! our wedding was small, but there were people on the guest list that i didn't know. my mother in law is in politics, so it was partly for show i think.

seriously, my husband's best man was someone that i didn't meet until a month before the wedding. and he lived 5 houses down from us. apparently he and my husband were best friends from early childhood all the way through highschool and they had this pact that they were going to be eachother's best men. so this guy shows up one night and says he is my fiance's best friend and the best man in our wedding. news to me. what about the 4 guys that we were really close to? what about his brother?

i think weddings turn into what others want and turn into a show... if it is true love and genuine i don't think it matters if you spend $85,000 or $1000 eloping... just make it all about the two of you! and make it sincere (even if sincere is $100,000)! make people talk about the magic that they were able to witness and share, not about how much you spent on the table center pieces and how much you put into the bar stock!
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