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Old 11-06-2006, 09:21 AM   #1 (permalink)
Just imagine Derf
 
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911 calls

Subject: 911 calls

BELIEVE it or not,
These are REAL 911 Calls!

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming
from the brown
house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?


Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite
out of my ham
and cheese sandwich.
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left
it on the kitchen
table and when I came back from the
bathroom, someone had
taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and
I'm sick and tired
of it!


Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my
phone doesn't have
an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was
nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven
are the same
thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.


Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions
are only two
minutes apart
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

And the winner is..........

Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm
all out of breath.
Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.

Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are
you an asthmatic?
Caller: No
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started
having trouble
breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police
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Old 11-06-2006, 01:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
Looking at my Ta-Tas ..eh
 
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Re: 911 calls

funny
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Old 11-06-2006, 01:52 PM   #3 (permalink)
I love Derf!!
 
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Re: 911 calls

I don't get it?

LMAO.. jk.
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Old 11-06-2006, 01:52 PM   #4 (permalink)
Looking at my Ta-Tas ..eh
 
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Re: 911 calls

no shes serious....lol
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Old 11-06-2006, 02:24 PM   #5 (permalink)
I love Derf!!
 
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Re: 911 calls

Hey...
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