My wife sent me this.....

TheBeachStop · 03-02-2006, 03:22 AM

I kinda feel offended by this.... aw, WTH, I need a beer. hehehe

Winter classes for Men at

The Learning Center for Adults

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Friday, March 3, 2006

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor --- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How ! To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum .
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises , Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses,
diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Electric_Sun · 03-02-2006, 07:24 AM

Dustin · 03-02-2006, 08:53 AM

I don't need any classes, I do all the work around my house

electricbeach2 · 03-02-2006, 10:26 AM

Were do you sign them up again?

CAYENNE2005 · 03-02-2006, 10:34 AM

mikejones · 03-02-2006, 10:39 AM

There is also a class for the wives. Very simple

Lesson 1: How to keep your face shut and *** in the kitchen cookin
Lesson 2: Realiseing that yes, you are just some dumb ho and need to keep your face shut and get your *** in the kitchen and cook
Lesson 3: Bring me a god dam beer for christ sakes when the ball is NOT in play and keep your face shut and make sure the frikkin gravey isn't burnt with all your slacking off.
Lesson 4: Learn to look before sitting in an open toilet. No wonder you can't drive worth a sh*t. You can't even aim your fat *** onto a toilet. and GRAB ME ANOTHER BEER ON THE WAY TO WASHING THE TOILET WATER OFF YOUR *** LIPS!

mikeytan · 03-02-2006, 10:46 AM

Good one BeachStop!

CAYENNE2005 · 03-02-2006, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mikejones

There is also a class for the wives. Very simple

Lesson 1: How to keep your face shut and *** in the kitchen cookin
Lesson 2: Realiseing that yes, you are just some dumb ho and need to keep your face shut and get your *** in the kitchen and cook
Lesson 3: Bring me a god dam beer for christ sakes when the ball is NOT in play and keep your face shut and make sure the frikkin gravey isn't burnt with all your slacking off.
Lesson 4: Learn to look before sitting in an open toilet. No wonder you can't drive worth a sh*t. You can't even aim your fat *** onto a toilet. and GRAB ME ANOTHER BEER ON THE WAY TO WASHING THE TOILET WATER OFF YOUR *** LIPS!

I take it your not married.

Dustin · 03-02-2006, 11:22 AM

I would agree with Cayenne

mikejones · 03-02-2006, 11:23 AM

Not yet. In the works. not my fault you can't keep your hos in line.

03-02-2006, 07:24 AM	#2 (permalink)
Electric_Sun Just chill out, will ya! Join Date: Feb 27 2006 Location: BFF Field Office #2 Posts: 587 Rep Power: 76	Re: My wife sent me this..... __________________ Ban Virgin

03-02-2006, 08:53 AM	#3 (permalink)
Dustin Official BFF Member Join Date: Feb 10 2005 Location: CO Posts: 5,926 Rep Power: 9	Re: My wife sent me this..... I don't need any classes, I do all the work around my house

03-02-2006, 10:26 AM	#4 (permalink)
electricbeach2 Official BFF Member Join Date: Feb 8 2006 Location: Sooner Country Age: 28 Posts: 155 Rep Power: 88	Re: My wife sent me this..... Were do you sign them up again? __________________ Just face it! Brunettes will always be better.

03-02-2006, 10:34 AM	#5 (permalink)
CAYENNE2005 I love Derf!! Join Date: Jan 31 2005 Location: Around the corner Age: 40 Posts: 2,580 Rep Power: 127	Re: My wife sent me this..... LOL __________________ http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2454464 myspace.com/350zclubofflorida www.myspace.com/oceanrayz

03-02-2006, 10:39 AM	#6 (permalink)
mikejones Join Date: Sep 30 2005 Posts: 649 Rep Power: 7	Re: My wife sent me this..... There is also a class for the wives. Very simple Lesson 1: How to keep your face shut and * in the kitchen cookin Lesson 2: Realiseing that yes, you are just some dumb ho and need to keep your face shut and get your * in the kitchen and cook Lesson 3: Bring me a god dam beer for christ sakes when the ball is NOT in play and keep your face shut and make sure the frikkin gravey isn't burnt with all your slacking off. Lesson 4: Learn to look before sitting in an open toilet. No wonder you can't drive worth a sht. You can't even aim your fat onto a toilet. and GRAB ME ANOTHER BEER ON THE WAY TO WASHING THE TOILET WATER OFF YOUR * LIPS! __________________ I need a dime that's top of the line Cute face slim waist wit a big behind

03-02-2006, 10:46 AM	#7 (permalink)
mikeytan I love Derf!! Join Date: Aug 21 2004 Location: The Islands Age: 30 Posts: 1,449 Rep Power: 6	Re: My wife sent me this..... Good one BeachStop! __________________ Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

03-02-2006, 11:22 AM	#9 (permalink)
Dustin Official BFF Member Join Date: Feb 10 2005 Location: CO Posts: 5,926 Rep Power: 9	Re: My wife sent me this..... I would agree with Cayenne

03-02-2006, 11:23 AM	#10 (permalink)
mikejones Join Date: Sep 30 2005 Posts: 649 Rep Power: 7	Re: My wife sent me this..... Not yet. In the works. not my fault you can't keep your hos in line. __________________ I need a dime that's top of the line Cute face slim waist wit a big behind

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