Internet chatrooms. Is it cheating? - Page 2

JOLEE · 09-12-2005, 06:53 PM

I'm very mixed up about this, but I guess in the end..it does seem that it would be cheating...he is satisfying a need somewhere in there (and somehow) and it doesn't involve his wife..in fact, it sounds like he was hiding it from her possibly...thats the cheatin' kind.

MATT A · 09-12-2005, 07:01 PM

Quote:
On 2005-09-12 17:28:00, Tanzenite wrote:
Quote:
On 2005-09-12 17:19:00, GENIUS wrote:
From a Guys standpoint no it's not cheating..

So your saying that if it were your wife having these relations on the internet with other men, you would be o.k. with that?

I'm not married but almost was. Another story for another day. But most women who are the net do cheat. The one's going to look for it do. So when I say most women the one's on the net looking to which I may add there are more than you think.

Would I be ok with it if I was married. That all depends if I am thinking like a Guy that wants her and her Girlfriend have some fun.

Or am I thking like a married man that is honest and a good man. Then no I'd kick her to the curb yesterday.

Fact is more and more married people cheat today and the other half does not know it.

MATT A · 09-12-2005, 07:02 PM

BAD BOY

MATT A · 09-12-2005, 07:15 PM

I modded that as a joke nothing too bad.

mr belvedere · 09-12-2005, 07:19 PM

~whew~ Thought whatever it is I've got might be contagious. Haha very funny muppet framer!

mr belvedere · 09-12-2005, 07:40 PM

Quote:
On 2005-09-12 18:01:00, GENIUS wrote:
Quote:
On 2005-09-12 17:28:00, Tanzenite wrote:
Quote:
On 2005-09-12 17:19:00, GENIUS wrote:
From a Guys standpoint no it's not cheating..

So your saying that if it were your wife having these relations on the internet with other men, you would be o.k. with that?

I'm not married but almost was. Another story for another day. But most women who are the net do cheat. The one's going to look for it do. So when I say most women the one's on the net looking to which I may add there are more than you think.

Would I be ok with it if I was married. That all depends if I am thinking like a Guy that wants her and her Girlfriend have some fun.

Or am I thking like a married man that is honest and a good man. Then no I'd kick her to the curb yesterday.

Fact is more and more married people cheat today and the other half does not know it. You're a Genius! All true. I was playing chess the other day with some gal. She wanted to know what I looked like. I told her. I was honest. She wanted me. Told her I was married with children She says "What are you doing on here then?!" I just wanted to play chess. Queen Bee reads the chat screen, gets all bent out of shape. Point is, it's not a "gender" affliction by any means. And each situations is different. Some people "play around" on-line for the "rush", and it never goes farther than that. Other people fall in love/lust and make a life change over it. Fact is, in any relationship; romantic or friendship, you need only two things to keep the relationship going: desire and effort. You can't have one without the other. And even with both, the relationship still only has a guaranteed 50% chance of survival, becuase it takes two people with desire and effort to keep the thing going. Personally, it wouldn't bother me if I found out the queen bee was playing around on-line. It would be a wake-up call for me. Has my desire and/or effort been lacking? Is hers gone? Of course I love her, and would hate to lose her. But if someone "needs" to go, and there is no other way for them, then all the desire and effort in the world on my part will not change it. We all get "caught up" in "new excitement" from time to time. Whether it's a new tanning bed, a tanning website (that would be me), or a stranger that interests you, it happens. However, it doesn't have to be the "end of the book", sometimes it just means it's time to start a new chapter. Good luck.

lady bug · 09-12-2005, 09:08 PM

As the others say...**** ya it is cheating.....EMOTIONALLY! Something is lacking in the relationship..

CAYENNE2005 · 09-12-2005, 09:50 PM

Boy, I would have settled for that! That is NOTHING compared to what happened to me! Now that my husband has done what he has done, over a monitor would be no big deal now!!

But, before my recent sickening incident, I would say cheating is physically touching someone (in that way). Talking on the internet, it isn't right not because it is cheating but, because he/she is obviously not happy in his/her present relationship. I would tell your friend she needs to communicate with her man and find out if there is something they need to work on. Just my opinion.

COCONUT · 09-13-2005, 09:09 AM

well said!!!!

[/quote]You're a Genius! All true. I was playing chess the other day with some gal. She wanted to know what I looked like. I told her. I was honest. She wanted me. Told her I was married with children She says "What are you doing on here then?!" I just wanted to play chess. Queen Bee reads the chat screen, gets all bent out of shape. Point is, it's not a "gender" affliction by any means. And each situations is different. Some people "play around" on-line for the "rush", and it never goes farther than that. Other people fall in love/lust and make a life change over it. Fact is, in any relationship; romantic or friendship, you need only two things to keep the relationship going: desire and effort. You can't have one without the other. And even with both, the relationship still only has a guaranteed 50% chance of survival, becuase it takes two people with desire and effort to keep the thing going. Personally, it wouldn't bother me if I found out the queen bee was playing around on-line. It would be a wake-up call for me. Has my desire and/or effort been lacking? Is hers gone? Of course I love her, and would hate to lose her. But if someone "needs" to go, and there is no other way for them, then all the desire and effort in the world on my part will not change it. We all get "caught up" in "new excitement" from time to time. Whether it's a new tanning bed, a tanning website (that would be me), or a stranger that interests you, it happens. However, it doesn't have to be the "end of the book", sometimes it just means it's time to start a new chapter. Good luck. [/quote][ This Message was edited by: COCONUT on 2005-09-13 08:10 ]

ChristineE · 09-13-2005, 09:19 AM

If I found that my husband were on line "chatting" with women other than in some kind of forum such as this (or like Mr. B said, playing chess or something like that)....I would be extremely hurt. And to me, while it may not be physical "cheating" it sure is a step in that direction. I mean really, there would have to be something wrong with the present relationship for someone to be looking to meet someone on line. One of the girls that works for me is always talking about meeting guys on line....she is single. And to me that is still scarey to meet them in person... Anyway, I don't know if cheating is the word for it, but it is certainly not right.

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09-12-2005, 06:53 PM	#11 (permalink)
JOLEE Join Date: Nov 25 2003 Posts: 858 Rep Power: 6	I'm very mixed up about this, but I guess in the end..it does seem that it would be cheating...he is satisfying a need somewhere in there (and somehow) and it doesn't involve his wife..in fact, it sounds like he was hiding it from her possibly...thats the cheatin' kind.

09-12-2005, 07:01 PM	#12 (permalink)
MATT A Police Department Join Date: Sep 6 2004 Location: Awaiting Posts: 15,703 Rep Power: 31	Quote: On 2005-09-12 17:28:00, Tanzenite wrote: Quote: On 2005-09-12 17:19:00, GENIUS wrote: From a Guys standpoint no it's not cheating.. So your saying that if it were your wife having these relations on the internet with other men, you would be o.k. with that? I'm not married but almost was. Another story for another day. But most women who are the net do cheat. The one's going to look for it do. So when I say most women the one's on the net looking to which I may add there are more than you think. Would I be ok with it if I was married. That all depends if I am thinking like a Guy that wants her and her Girlfriend have some fun. Or am I thking like a married man that is honest and a good man. Then no I'd kick her to the curb yesterday. Fact is more and more married people cheat today and the other half does not know it.

09-12-2005, 07:02 PM	#13 (permalink)
MATT A Police Department Join Date: Sep 6 2004 Location: Awaiting Posts: 15,703 Rep Power: 31	BAD BOY

09-12-2005, 07:15 PM	#14 (permalink)
MATT A Police Department Join Date: Sep 6 2004 Location: Awaiting Posts: 15,703 Rep Power: 31	I modded that as a joke nothing too bad.

09-12-2005, 07:19 PM	#15 (permalink)
mr belvedere DERFERATOR Join Date: May 10 2005 Age: 39 Posts: 8,591 Rep Power: 52	~whew~ Thought whatever it is I've got might be contagious. Haha very funny muppet framer!

09-12-2005, 07:40 PM	#16 (permalink)
mr belvedere DERFERATOR Join Date: May 10 2005 Age: 39 Posts: 8,591 Rep Power: 52	Quote: On 2005-09-12 18:01:00, GENIUS wrote: Quote: On 2005-09-12 17:28:00, Tanzenite wrote: Quote: On 2005-09-12 17:19:00, GENIUS wrote: From a Guys standpoint no it's not cheating.. So your saying that if it were your wife having these relations on the internet with other men, you would be o.k. with that? I'm not married but almost was. Another story for another day. But most women who are the net do cheat. The one's going to look for it do. So when I say most women the one's on the net looking to which I may add there are more than you think. Would I be ok with it if I was married. That all depends if I am thinking like a Guy that wants her and her Girlfriend have some fun. Or am I thking like a married man that is honest and a good man. Then no I'd kick her to the curb yesterday. Fact is more and more married people cheat today and the other half does not know it. You're a Genius! All true. I was playing chess the other day with some gal. She wanted to know what I looked like. I told her. I was honest. She wanted me. Told her I was married with children She says "What are you doing on here then?!" I just wanted to play chess. Queen Bee reads the chat screen, gets all bent out of shape. Point is, it's not a "gender" affliction by any means. And each situations is different. Some people "play around" on-line for the "rush", and it never goes farther than that. Other people fall in love/lust and make a life change over it. Fact is, in any relationship; romantic or friendship, you need only two things to keep the relationship going: desire and effort. You can't have one without the other. And even with both, the relationship still only has a guaranteed 50% chance of survival, becuase it takes two people with desire and effort to keep the thing going. Personally, it wouldn't bother me if I found out the queen bee was playing around on-line. It would be a wake-up call for me. Has my desire and/or effort been lacking? Is hers gone? Of course I love her, and would hate to lose her. But if someone "needs" to go, and there is no other way for them, then all the desire and effort in the world on my part will not change it. We all get "caught up" in "new excitement" from time to time. Whether it's a new tanning bed, a tanning website (that would be me), or a stranger that interests you, it happens. However, it doesn't have to be the "end of the book", sometimes it just means it's time to start a new chapter. Good luck.

09-12-2005, 09:08 PM	#17 (permalink)
lady bug Join Date: Mar 7 2005 Posts: 589 Rep Power: 8	As the others say...**** ya it is cheating.....EMOTIONALLY! Something is lacking in the relationship..

09-12-2005, 09:50 PM	#18 (permalink)
CAYENNE2005 I love Derf!! Join Date: Jan 31 2005 Location: Around the corner Age: 40 Posts: 2,581 Rep Power: 127	Boy, I would have settled for that! That is NOTHING compared to what happened to me! Now that my husband has done what he has done, over a monitor would be no big deal now!! But, before my recent sickening incident, I would say cheating is physically touching someone (in that way). Talking on the internet, it isn't right not because it is cheating but, because he/she is obviously not happy in his/her present relationship. I would tell your friend she needs to communicate with her man and find out if there is something they need to work on. Just my opinion.

09-13-2005, 09:09 AM	#19 (permalink)
COCONUT ~THE ORIGINAL COCO~ Join Date: Sep 2 2003 Location: NJ Posts: 6,224 Rep Power: 18	well said!!!! [/quote]You're a Genius! All true. I was playing chess the other day with some gal. She wanted to know what I looked like. I told her. I was honest. She wanted me. Told her I was married with children She says "What are you doing on here then?!" I just wanted to play chess. Queen Bee reads the chat screen, gets all bent out of shape. Point is, it's not a "gender" affliction by any means. And each situations is different. Some people "play around" on-line for the "rush", and it never goes farther than that. Other people fall in love/lust and make a life change over it. Fact is, in any relationship; romantic or friendship, you need only two things to keep the relationship going: desire and effort. You can't have one without the other. And even with both, the relationship still only has a guaranteed 50% chance of survival, becuase it takes two people with desire and effort to keep the thing going. Personally, it wouldn't bother me if I found out the queen bee was playing around on-line. It would be a wake-up call for me. Has my desire and/or effort been lacking? Is hers gone? Of course I love her, and would hate to lose her. But if someone "needs" to go, and there is no other way for them, then all the desire and effort in the world on my part will not change it. We all get "caught up" in "new excitement" from time to time. Whether it's a new tanning bed, a tanning website (that would be me), or a stranger that interests you, it happens. However, it doesn't have to be the "end of the book", sometimes it just means it's time to start a new chapter. Good luck. [/quote][ This Message was edited by: COCONUT on 2005-09-13 08:10 ]

09-13-2005, 09:19 AM	#20 (permalink)
ChristineE OFFICIAL BFF MEMBER Join Date: Jan 7 2005 Location: BFF Headquarters Age: 36 Posts: 2,700 Rep Power: 97	If I found that my husband were on line "chatting" with women other than in some kind of forum such as this (or like Mr. B said, playing chess or something like that)....I would be extremely hurt. And to me, while it may not be physical "cheating" it sure is a step in that direction. I mean really, there would have to be something wrong with the present relationship for someone to be looking to meet someone on line. One of the girls that works for me is always talking about meeting guys on line....she is single. And to me that is still scarey to meet them in person... Anyway, I don't know if cheating is the word for it, but it is certainly not right.

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