Your Favorite Simpson\'s quote!!! - tanTALK

gripmarketing · 11-24-2004, 10:09 AM

A little American humor for the American holiday season...

What's your favorite quote? And you have a choice: you can include the character and context if you like, or you can keep it a mystery and let other Simpsoid geeks compete for bonus points.

Homer: "That baby-proofing crook wanted to sell us safety covers for the electrical outlets. But I'll just draw bunny faces on them to scare Maggie away."
Marge: "She's not afraid of bunnies."
Homer (ominously): "She will be."

Homer(To Lisa, referring to guest Steven Hawking): "So, Lisa, did you have fun with your robot buddy?"

From the episode where Homer gets audited by the IRS, and is arrested...the IRS offers Homer a plea bargain...

IRS Agent: "You'll be working for us now."
Homer (in hushed voice): "OK, but can you pay me under the table? I got a little tax problem."

Neon Beach · 11-24-2004, 10:42 AM

I love Homer.

Not that Way!!!

engfant · 11-24-2004, 10:47 AM

Homer: "this man is a fruit...I mean QUEER QUEER. That's what you like to be called right?"

john the homosexual: "Yeah, that or John."

Neon Beach · 11-24-2004, 10:57 AM

foflmao!!

engfant · 11-24-2004, 11:01 AM

totally ripped off froma different site:

Bartender: Uh, sorry you gotta be a pilot to drink here.
Homer: Uh, but I am a pilot.
Bartender: Where's your uniform?
Homer: Um, I stowed it safely in the overhead compartment.
Bartender:Well you talk the talk. Here's a loaner.

Reporter: Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into outer space?
Homer: I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes. (Homer thinks for a minute then relizes something).
Homer: Wait a minute, Statue of Liberty--that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! darn you! darn you all to ****!

Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: Ooooh, that's bad.
Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt!
Homer: That's good.
Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
ShopKeeper: But you get your choice of topping.
Homer: That's good.
ShopKeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
(Homer stares at the shopkeeper, not comprehending what this means.)
Shopkeeper: That's bad.

Homer: Everything reminds me of Marge
Lenny: How do you think I feel, we're coming up on Mount Carlmore
Homer: Does Carl know about that?
Lenny: We haven't discussed it.

Dr. Hibbert: I'm afraid your playing days are over my friend, but don't worry, you can fall back on your degree in--Communications? Oh dear Lord!
Luchenko: Da I know I know it phony major. Luchenko lean nothing, nothing!

"Go Banana" -Ralph Wiggum
"Me fail English? That's unpossible" -Ralph Wiggum

"Oh, relax kids. I've got a gut feeling Uter's around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might evern say we just ate Uter and he's in our stomachs right now! Wait, Scratch that one." -Principal Skinner

"You've got to listen to me! Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok in an orgy of blood and kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving." -Professor Frink

"Arnie Pie in the sky with the morning commute. Traffic this morning is as bad as it gets. Due to a fire at the army testing lab a bunch of escaped, infected mokeys are roaming the expressway. Despite the swealtering heat, don't unroll your windows 'cause those monkeys seem confused and irritable." -Arnie Pie

"The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the key pad with your palm, now."

"The Simpsons are going to Delaware!" (a personal favorite)

"Calm down, Neddilly-diddily-diddily-diddily-diddily...They did their best...Shoddily-iddily-iddily-diddly...Gotta be nice...hostility-ilitity-bility-dility--Aw, ****, diddly-ding-dong-crap!" -Ned Flanders

"Frankly, I would have expected better from Jimmy 'the Scumbag.'" -Chief Wiggum

"From A-Apple to Z-Zebra, Baby's First Pop-Up Book is twenty-six pages of alphabetic adventure." -Bart

"Pray for Mojo" -Mojo the helper monkey

"But I cleaned it with my napkin" -Dr. Nick

"When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University!" -Ralph Wiggum

"Yeah, she's going with the House!" -Millhouse

"I have purchased the YMCA. I plan to tear it down and turn it into a nature preserve. There I will hunt the most dangerous game of all--Humans" -Ranier Wolfcastle

"Carl Carlson!" -Lenny

gripmarketing · 11-24-2004, 11:26 AM

Homer:
"Doughnuts..is there anything they can't do?"

gripmarketing · 11-24-2004, 11:26 AM

Homer:"If the Bible has taught us anything, and it hasn't ..."

gripmarketing · 11-24-2004, 11:27 AM

Homer: "I'm not going to lie to you Marge.....seeya!"

twinkie1 · 11-24-2004, 11:35 AM

Quote:
On 2004-11-24 11:01:00, engfant wrote:
totally ripped off froma different site:

Bartender: Uh, sorry you gotta be a pilot to drink here.
Homer: Uh, but I am a pilot.
Bartender: Where's your uniform?
Homer: Um, I stowed it safely in the overhead compartment.
Bartender:Well you talk the talk. Here's a loaner.

Reporter: Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into outer space?
Homer: I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes. (Homer thinks for a minute then relizes something).
Homer: Wait a minute, Statue of Liberty--that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! darn you! darn you all to ****!

Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: Ooooh, that's bad.
Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt!
Homer: That's good.
Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
ShopKeeper: But you get your choice of topping.
Homer: That's good.
ShopKeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
(Homer stares at the shopkeeper, not comprehending what this means.)
Shopkeeper: That's bad.

Homer: Everything reminds me of Marge
Lenny: How do you think I feel, we're coming up on Mount Carlmore
Homer: Does Carl know about that?
Lenny: We haven't discussed it.

Dr. Hibbert: I'm afraid your playing days are over my friend, but don't worry, you can fall back on your degree in--Communications? Oh dear Lord!
Luchenko: Da I know I know it phony major. Luchenko lean nothing, nothing!

"Go Banana" -Ralph Wiggum
"Me fail English? That's unpossible" -Ralph Wiggum

"Oh, relax kids. I've got a gut feeling Uter's around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might evern say we just ate Uter and he's in our stomachs right now! Wait, Scratch that one." -Principal Skinner

"You've got to listen to me! Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok in an orgy of blood and kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving." -Professor Frink

"Arnie Pie in the sky with the morning commute. Traffic this morning is as bad as it gets. Due to a fire at the army testing lab a bunch of escaped, infected mokeys are roaming the expressway. Despite the swealtering heat, don't unroll your windows 'cause those monkeys seem confused and irritable." -Arnie Pie

"The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the key pad with your palm, now."

"The Simpsons are going to Delaware!" (a personal favorite)

"Calm down, Neddilly-diddily-diddily-diddily-diddily...They did their best...Shoddily-iddily-iddily-diddly...Gotta be nice...hostility-ilitity-bility-dility--Aw, ****, diddly-ding-dong-crap!" -Ned Flanders

"Frankly, I would have expected better from Jimmy 'the Scumbag.'" -Chief Wiggum

"From A-Apple to Z-Zebra, Baby's First Pop-Up Book is twenty-six pages of alphabetic adventure." -Bart

"Pray for Mojo" -Mojo the helper monkey

"But I cleaned it with my napkin" -Dr. Nick

"When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University!" -Ralph Wiggum

"Yeah, she's going with the House!" -Millhouse

"I have purchased the YMCA. I plan to tear it down and turn it into a nature preserve. There I will hunt the most dangerous game of all--Humans" -Ranier Wolfcastle

"Carl Carlson!" -Lenny

DO!!
This is too FUNNY!

gripmarketing · 11-24-2004, 11:41 AM

Homer: "I hear they have the Internet on computers now."

Chief Wiggum:

"This is Papa Bear. Put out an APB for a male suspect, driving a... car of some sort, heading in the direction of, uh, you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless."

"Can't you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can't be policing the entire city!"

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11-24-2004, 10:09 AM	#1 (permalink)
gripmarketing Join Date: May 25 2002 Posts: 970 Rep Power: 8	A little American humor for the American holiday season... What's your favorite quote? And you have a choice: you can include the character and context if you like, or you can keep it a mystery and let other Simpsoid geeks compete for bonus points. Homer: "That baby-proofing crook wanted to sell us safety covers for the electrical outlets. But I'll just draw bunny faces on them to scare Maggie away." Marge: "She's not afraid of bunnies." Homer (ominously): "She will be." Homer(To Lisa, referring to guest Steven Hawking): "So, Lisa, did you have fun with your robot buddy?" From the episode where Homer gets audited by the IRS, and is arrested...the IRS offers Homer a plea bargain... IRS Agent: "You'll be working for us now." Homer (in hushed voice): "OK, but can you pay me under the table? I got a little tax problem."

11-24-2004, 10:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
Neon Beach Join Date: Nov 30 2000 Location: Ontario Age: 47 Posts: 38,466 Rep Power: 93	I love Homer. Not that Way!!!

11-24-2004, 10:47 AM	#3 (permalink)
engfant FREE ENGFANTUCATION Join Date: May 20 2003 Posts: 9,024 Rep Power: 14	Homer: "this man is a fruit...I mean QUEER QUEER. That's what you like to be called right?" john the homosexual: "Yeah, that or John."

11-24-2004, 10:57 AM	#4 (permalink)
Neon Beach Join Date: Nov 30 2000 Location: Ontario Age: 47 Posts: 38,466 Rep Power: 93	foflmao!!

11-24-2004, 11:01 AM	#5 (permalink)
engfant FREE ENGFANTUCATION Join Date: May 20 2003 Posts: 9,024 Rep Power: 14	totally ripped off froma different site: Bartender: Uh, sorry you gotta be a pilot to drink here. Homer: Uh, but I am a pilot. Bartender: Where's your uniform? Homer: Um, I stowed it safely in the overhead compartment. Bartender:Well you talk the talk. Here's a loaner. Reporter: Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into outer space? Homer: I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes. (Homer thinks for a minute then relizes something). Homer: Wait a minute, Statue of Liberty--that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! darn you! darn you all to **! Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse! Homer: Ooooh, that's bad. Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt! Homer: That's good. Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed. Homer: That's bad. ShopKeeper: But you get your choice of topping. Homer: That's good. ShopKeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate. (Homer stares at the shopkeeper, not comprehending what this means.) Shopkeeper: That's bad. Homer: Everything reminds me of Marge Lenny: How do you think I feel, we're coming up on Mount Carlmore Homer: Does Carl know about that? Lenny: We haven't discussed it. Dr. Hibbert: I'm afraid your playing days are over my friend, but don't worry, you can fall back on your degree in--Communications? Oh dear Lord! Luchenko: Da I know I know it phony major. Luchenko lean nothing, nothing! "Go Banana" -Ralph Wiggum "Me fail English? That's unpossible" -Ralph Wiggum "Oh, relax kids. I've got a gut feeling Uter's around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might evern say we just ate Uter and he's in our stomachs right now! Wait, Scratch that one." -Principal Skinner "You've got to listen to me! Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok in an orgy of blood and kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving." -Professor Frink "Arnie Pie in the sky with the morning commute. Traffic this morning is as bad as it gets. Due to a fire at the army testing lab a bunch of escaped, infected mokeys are roaming the expressway. Despite the swealtering heat, don't unroll your windows 'cause those monkeys seem confused and irritable." -Arnie Pie "The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the key pad with your palm, now." "The Simpsons are going to Delaware!" (a personal favorite) "Calm down, Neddilly-diddily-diddily-diddily-diddily...They did their best...Shoddily-iddily-iddily-diddly...Gotta be nice...hostility-ilitity-bility-dility--Aw, **, diddly-ding-dong-crap!" -Ned Flanders "Frankly, I would have expected better from Jimmy 'the Scumbag.'" -Chief Wiggum "From A-Apple to Z-Zebra, Baby's First Pop-Up Book is twenty-six pages of alphabetic adventure." -Bart "Pray for Mojo" -Mojo the helper monkey "But I cleaned it with my napkin" -Dr. Nick "When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University!" -Ralph Wiggum "Yeah, she's going with the House!" -Millhouse "I have purchased the YMCA. I plan to tear it down and turn it into a nature preserve. There I will hunt the most dangerous game of all--Humans" -Ranier Wolfcastle "Carl Carlson!" -Lenny

11-24-2004, 11:26 AM	#6 (permalink)
gripmarketing Join Date: May 25 2002 Posts: 970 Rep Power: 8	Homer: "Doughnuts..is there anything they can't do?"

11-24-2004, 11:26 AM	#7 (permalink)
gripmarketing Join Date: May 25 2002 Posts: 970 Rep Power: 8	Homer:"If the Bible has taught us anything, and it hasn't ..."

11-24-2004, 11:27 AM	#8 (permalink)
gripmarketing Join Date: May 25 2002 Posts: 970 Rep Power: 8	Homer: "I'm not going to lie to you Marge.....seeya!"

11-24-2004, 11:35 AM	#9 (permalink)
twinkie1 Join Date: May 1 2004 Location: new york Posts: 113 Rep Power: 6	Quote: On 2004-11-24 11:01:00, engfant wrote: totally ripped off froma different site: Bartender: Uh, sorry you gotta be a pilot to drink here. Homer: Uh, but I am a pilot. Bartender: Where's your uniform? Homer: Um, I stowed it safely in the overhead compartment. Bartender:Well you talk the talk. Here's a loaner. Reporter: Uh, question for the barbecue chef: Don't you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into outer space? Homer: I'll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes. (Homer thinks for a minute then relizes something). Homer: Wait a minute, Statue of Liberty--that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! darn you! darn you all to **! Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse! Homer: Ooooh, that's bad. Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt! Homer: That's good. Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed. Homer: That's bad. ShopKeeper: But you get your choice of topping. Homer: That's good. ShopKeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate. (Homer stares at the shopkeeper, not comprehending what this means.) Shopkeeper: That's bad. Homer: Everything reminds me of Marge Lenny: How do you think I feel, we're coming up on Mount Carlmore Homer: Does Carl know about that? Lenny: We haven't discussed it. Dr. Hibbert: I'm afraid your playing days are over my friend, but don't worry, you can fall back on your degree in--Communications? Oh dear Lord! Luchenko: Da I know I know it phony major. Luchenko lean nothing, nothing! "Go Banana" -Ralph Wiggum "Me fail English? That's unpossible" -Ralph Wiggum "Oh, relax kids. I've got a gut feeling Uter's around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might evern say we just ate Uter and he's in our stomachs right now! Wait, Scratch that one." -Principal Skinner "You've got to listen to me! Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok in an orgy of blood and kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving." -Professor Frink "Arnie Pie in the sky with the morning commute. Traffic this morning is as bad as it gets. Due to a fire at the army testing lab a bunch of escaped, infected mokeys are roaming the expressway. Despite the swealtering heat, don't unroll your windows 'cause those monkeys seem confused and irritable." -Arnie Pie "The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the key pad with your palm, now." "The Simpsons are going to Delaware!" (a personal favorite) "Calm down, Neddilly-diddily-diddily-diddily-diddily...They did their best...Shoddily-iddily-iddily-diddly...Gotta be nice...hostility-ilitity-bility-dility--Aw, **, diddly-ding-dong-crap!" -Ned Flanders "Frankly, I would have expected better from Jimmy 'the Scumbag.'" -Chief Wiggum "From A-Apple to Z-Zebra, Baby's First Pop-Up Book is twenty-six pages of alphabetic adventure." -Bart "Pray for Mojo" -Mojo the helper monkey "But I cleaned it with my napkin" -Dr. Nick "When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University!" -Ralph Wiggum "Yeah, she's going with the House!" -Millhouse "I have purchased the YMCA. I plan to tear it down and turn it into a nature preserve. There I will hunt the most dangerous game of all--Humans" -Ranier Wolfcastle "Carl Carlson!" -Lenny DO!! This is too FUNNY!

11-24-2004, 11:41 AM	#10 (permalink)
gripmarketing Join Date: May 25 2002 Posts: 970 Rep Power: 8	Homer: "I hear they have the Internet on computers now." Chief Wiggum: "This is Papa Bear. Put out an APB for a male suspect, driving a... car of some sort, heading in the direction of, uh, you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless." "Can't you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can't be policing the entire city!"

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