Sherin

ORDERING PIZZA IN 2008

This is so close to what could happen in 2008 that we're not sure how funny this really is...

Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national IDnumber?
Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.

Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir.
Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610.

Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email address is sheehan@home.net mailto:sheehan@home.net<mailto:sheeha n@home.net. Which number are you calling from sir?
Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?
Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.
Customer: The HSS, what is that?
Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will
add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.
Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas.
Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.
Customer: Whaddya mean?
Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol.Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice.
Customer: What?!?! What do you recommend, then?
Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.
Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?
Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion.
Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.
Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids.Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.
Customer: Lem'me give you my credit card number.
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash.
Your credit card balance is over its limit.
Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here.
Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is overdrawn also.
Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready.
How long will it take?
Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes,sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick'em up while you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward.
Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?
Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the tank yesterday.
Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@#
Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 4, 2003 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge. Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?
Customer: (speechless)
Operator: Will there be anything else, sir?
Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke..
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this..Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.

Neon Beach

that's wild, cause it's happening now. I tried to order a pizza a couple of months ago and they needed my postal code, I asked them where they were, and they were about a 9 hour drive from me, I told them to forget it, I wanna order local, and they said it wil come to you from your local pizza place, and Ii said, that's nice, but when the pizza is missing a topping I don't wanna call 9 hours away to get a few springlings of bacon. These call centres are getting stupid! Call center for a friggin' pizza?

Sqewk

The frigin pizza hut around here is automated, so watch which # you press or youll get that soybean pizza

SwedaGuy

One of the local pizza chains around here had a call center back in '87. Of course their farthest flung location wasn't nearly 9 hours from here. I understand it was kind of efficient, as you got to talk to a real person, at least...

Sherin

Maybe we could set up a call center for tanning?

trusno1

too funny

SwedaGuy

Well, you know, if I had more than one location, I would want to make sure that you could make an appointment at any salon from any other...it just makes sense...

sherlynn01

That's to funny!

Neon Beach

Funny thing is, my brother, who is a computer whiz, had a company years ago that helped to set up the Dominos I believe pizza ordering technology in the UK. I thought that was amazing back then, now it's just stupid. I called our local electrical provider 2 weeks ago to report a payment. They now use voice recognition instead of pushing the keypad. Good thing I wasn't a newly immigrated Chinese woman (not that there is anytbing wrong with that), that thing would never have figured out what I was saying (after 12 minutes on the phone). It's gone too far! We all want to talk to a real person who actually lives where we are, but those days are gone forever!

See: Robot salespeople thread

Sherin

I sued Domino's a few years ago...