Alias

"Dealing with AT&T"

Me: Hello
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes This is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: YES! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron please?
Me: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
Me: OK, hold on.

At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking
that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. Much to my
surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.

Me: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Line?
Me: May I ask who is calling please?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Line?
Me: Yes, is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: The phone company?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes sir, we are a phone company.
Me: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today Mr. Line.
Me: Well whatever it is, I'm really not interested but thanks for
calling.

When you are not interested in something, I don't think you can
express yourself any plainer than by saying "I'm really not interested",
but this lady was persistent.

AT&T: Mr. Line we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24
hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a "rate" of 10 cents a
minute but she at no time used the word rate. I could clearly see that
it was time to whip out the trusty old calculator and do a little
ciphering.

Me: Now, that's 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes
sir that's right! 24 hours a day!
Me: 7 days a week?
AT&T: That's right.
Me: 365 days a year?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
Me: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes sir, it's amazing how it ads up.
Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big
one at the end of the year for the full $52,560, and if you send
an annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
Me: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1008 per
week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you
will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh no sir I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10
cents a minute.
Me: Wait a minute here!!! Didn't you say you'd give me 10 cents a
minute. Are you sure this is AT&T?
AT&T: Well, yes this is AT&T sir but......
Me: But nothing, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give
me 10 cents a minute that I'll give you 10 cents a minute? Is
this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read
about things like this in the Enquirer you know. Don't use
your alien brainwashing techniques on me.
AT&T: No sir we are offering 10 cents a minute for.....
Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please!
AT&T: Sir I don't think that is necessary.
Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?
AT&T: What?
Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes Mr. Line. Please hold on.

So now AT&T has me on hold and my supper is getting cold. I begin to
eat while I'm waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes
and while I have a mouth full of food:

Supervisor: Mr. Line?
Me: Yeth?
Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10
cents a minute program.
Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?
Supervisor: Yes sir, it sure is.

I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do
to suppress my laughter and I had to be careful not to produce a snort.

Me: No, actually I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so
that I could sign up for the plan.
Supervisor: OK, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who
was helping you.
Me: Thank you.

I was on hold once again and was getting really hungry. I needed to
end this conversation.
Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end
of the phone.

AT&T: Hello Mr. Line, I understand that you are interested in
signing up for our plan?
Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never
have enough friends and I'm an only child and I'd really like to
have a little brother...
AT&T: (click)

BAHAMA MAMAS

~LOL~ That was very cute!

inactiveoffense

VERY FUNNY!!!!HAHAHAHA

TexasSun

Alias,

Now that was laugh out loud funny!! I'm taking notes and can't wait until my next AT&T call.

billable

Too bad it doesn't work for emails.

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Waiting list candidates 96,910
as of July 8 2007 at 4:23pm

Neon Beach

roflmao!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~tears~

__________________

tnannie

ROFLMAO! That's great!

hockey92

LMAO

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Gidget

This is pretty good. I would like to try answering like that but I would not be able to keep serious that long.

tnannie

My daughter used to get tired of the newspaper calling all of the time trying to get you signed up for deliveries, so she turned on her best "redneck" sounding voice and kept asking the sales rep if their paper had lots of pictures.....cause nobody in our house can read, so we just look at the pictures! LOL! The sales rep hung up on her....but they haven't called back! :)